Party Down With Old People
Monica reminded me that I haven’t finished writing about our trip to Florida which is now like two weeks in the past. I apologize about that. I promised to tell you about a few select things that I thought were pretty damn cool and/or funny. The party with the old people was one of them.
On Sunday, the night before we head out for the cruise, Monica’s aunt Bonnie invited us along to a birthday party for a friend of hers. She said it would be small with just a few other people there but I thought it would be terrible. Here we are in Florida to relax and have fun and now we’re going to get dragged to a party with a bunch of people we don’t know. We’ll probably sit there and watch the clock move at a snail’s pace all night long until Bonnie and Ken are ready to leave.
Surprisingly, it wasn’t anything like that. We went over to this gigantic house and met about 8 or 10 people. They were all interested in us and wanted to know all about us. It was a little weird, like these people didn’t see new people all that often so we were a sight to behold. We were included in conversation and it was a good time.
When dinner was served, Monica and I made it a point to go sit outside in this beautiful screened in patio area. There was a little pool, a jacuzzi, a BBQ and tables and chairs. It was great. A few other people said they’d come out to join us too as we were in the middle of conversation when dinner came out. After taking our seats, we started to chow down…and no one came outside. Not a single person. Later on they said that it was like a romantic dinner for two for us but I think that’s a load of crap. They just didn’t want to leave their air conditioning.
That’s what I don’t understand about Florida. Everyone moves down there because of the weather and then they all sit inside with their AC. What’s the point?
The night went on and we had cake and whatnot. Monica and I were given a tour of this huge house and shown all over the place. The best was yet to come though. We were talking to someone when over by the kitchen I heard the tail end of another conversation. All I heard was “something something something porch monkey something something.” My head immediately swung over. What did I just hear? Was that a racial slur just casually tossed out in regular conversation? Where the hell am I? WHEN the hell am I?
This is something I’ve never encountered before. Someone actually used the term “Porch Monkey” and they weren’t talking about Clerks II
The rest of the party went fine and we were out by around 10 or 11. Early times for some of the older folk. Monica and I were definitely the youngest there by at least 20 years. Such was our experience with the old people party.
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